Strange Days in the Desert: Memo to a Surrogate Cardinals Fan

First, Carlos, you are forgiven for contracting Cardinals Fever. It is permissible for lifetime Cowboys fans to have a surrogate team, recommended even. We grew up under the assumption that the Cowboys are ALWAYS in the playoffs, because they ALWAYS were. (1974 never happened).
Then Jerry Jones bought 'em, blew up life as we knew it and let Jimmy Johnson build a faster pussycat. But for all of his considerable business acumen and passion for the game, Jerry is a football fool.
He's a polished Pacman, bouncing from blunder to blunder, each usually legal in the criminal sense, but collectively felonious in football terms. He has expertly enhanced, embellished and exploited the Dallas brand, but he imploded the White House That Jimmy Built, and judged by on field success, the Cowboys have been nothing but a money trap since.
We Faithful have walked the desert for more than a decade, and Texans endure deep depression near the end of football season anyway, ever desperate to find something to get us through to the next August, even in good times.
And you, Carlos, wandered deeper into the desert than any of us. Yet here it is January, and the desert is blooming.
The Glendale/Racine Cardinals are the poster children for pro sports futility. Until two weeks ago, most Cardinals fans had never seen them win anything. Now they're a win from the Super Bowl.
Good God man. Go ahead and cheer. Hell, I am. Why not a San Diego-Arizona Super Bowl? That would stuff a sweat sock down the throats of those New England whiners. I even have a smattering of unjustifiable good will toward the Chargers, just because of the time I served in Stockton and the Spanos family's roots there.
So you are granted this exception, Carlos. Your Cowboys loyalties will not be questioned. In fact, I would load up on all of the Cardinals 2008 playoffs T-shirts and caps I could find.
History says they're sure to become collectors' items, guaranteed to gain value over time.
Me, I'm far removed from your climate of euphoria in the desert. Another foot of snow just fell on the Catskills, and the cabin fever is tightening its grip.
Little to do but numb the mind and let it drift to happier places, maybe go rummaging on eBay for Cowboys T-shirts from the '70s and '90s.